And I didn’t leave there because I didn’t find people I was interested in meeting, but because of the number of people and the lack of personalities, which made me feel overwhelmed.
I don’t know about you, but my job is to be in front of a screen.
The last thing I wanted on that occasion was to spend more time trying to create a relationship with a device in between.
That’s when I realized that I was fed up, completely burned out with the system of meeting people online through an app.
I was experiencing dating burnout.
It’s a feeling that ranges from being fed up with endless swipes , boredom with conversations that go nowhere, to the rudeness you can receive through the app (it almost seems that speaking badly has been normalized).
Or even that you end up suffering a ghosting after a few dates because whoever keeps you on the agenda as “Elena Tinder” is like putting you in a second category, that of someone who does not deserve emotional responsibility anywhere.
In short, the reasons why you finish up to the hat are many and varied.
Which was also my case, by the way. The third time was really the charm.
I didn’t close it because I regained hope of finding people like me in the offline world , but because I couldn’t take it anymore.
It is curious that, shortly after, I met someone live and a beautiful story began.
It could almost seem that the karma that had been accumulating from bad experiences held a positive surprise for me.
From the online world to getting to know each other organically
It was something that I was also discussing recently with a girl I met while hiking . She was sick of conversations that never ended with a date, but she was so wrapped up that she didn’t see any other way to meet people.
“And doing this?” I answered. After all, I had met the person I was dating at a social/sports event like that.
So in the end, the solution is as simple as looking for things you like off screen.
Because it is where you have the best chance of finding someone who also likes those hobbies and is already a starting point.
Except in my case, that I was a potato playing volleyball, but when he saw me falling all over the place and laughing at myself, he discovered that I had a sense of humor like his.
Another of the ‘organic’ ways that is becoming more frequent is to start talking with a friend of a friend or acquaintance that you find through a social network .
A meeting that is halfway between a flirt app and meeting naturally, because it reminds you of when you were introduced to someone (with the difference that you have it within reach of a follow when you see your friend upload a photo to her story with that person you are interested in).
In any case, signing up for a speed dating event or things that have nothing to do with your love life -such as a sport, association, dance classes, plans with strangers, networking , trips for single people, etc-, are very good alternatives if you have reached your limit with the applications and want to continue interacting.
And, if the person of your life is not there , the friendships that you will make along the way are also a love that is well worth finding.